Operation Chimney Sweep

Operation Chimney Sweep

The first-ever deployment of Sleigh One to San Francisco. Photo cc Sally McIntyre

Santa Claus prides himself on his ability to move freely about the world to undertake Christmas operations. The most visible symbol of Santa’s Christmas mobility is Sleigh One, his highly advanced personal transport. So it was only fitting that the Santa decided to bring Sleigh One to San Francisco’s Santacon, now in its 17th year of santarchy.

As soon as the Office of the Santa added Santacon to its pre-Christmas Operational Window tour, Santa’s helpers mobilized to make the trip a safe and successful one. Such high profile visits by the Santa require multiple layers of security, so the elves of the Bureau of Special Christmas Operations, and the fighting reindeer, nutcrackers, and sugar plum fairies of Santa’s Defense Forces formed a joint task force to protect the Santa and Sleigh One. The mission was code-named: Operation Chimney Sweep.

View the official Operation Chimney Sweep photo gallery. All photos of Santa’s Little Secret Service and Santa’s Defense Forces can be found in our Flickr photo documentation pool.

MISSION REPORT
The goals of Operation Chimney Sweep:

  • Provide 360 degree protection of Sleigh One and the Santa
  • Sweep for enemies of Santa, “Beards” (fake Santas), and suspicious gifts
  • Liaise with the public and local authorities to ensure Christmas cheer
  • Guarantee Christmas certainty at all costs

Santa’s Elves
Santa's Secret Service at City Hall - San Francisco SantaCon 2010 Photo cc Steve Rhodes
Sleigh One never travels without an extensive security umbrella and Operation Chimney Sweep was no exception. Santa’s elves fielded two security elements from the Bureau of Special Christmas Operations. Santa’s Little Secret Service deployed a close protection detail of elite elvish bodyguards to protect both the Santa and his sleigh. Santa’s Little Intelligence Support Team (LIST) provided elf operatives trained in naughty/nice interrogation and identification of enemies of Christmas.

Santa’s Defense Forces

Santa's Defense Forces

Santa's Defense Forces in action, Civic Center Plaza. Photo cc Sally McIntyre

Santa’s military deployed elements of three separate units. The 103rd Sleighborne Regiment deered Sleigh One, under the leadership of Lieutenant General “Olive” Cramer.

Lt. General Cramer

Lt. General Cramer and the 103rd Sleighborne Regiment. Photo cc Zachary Lara

The illustrious 12th Nutcracker regiment maintained perimeter security for Sleigh One with an assault squad of heavily armed Nutcracker soldiers. Despite rumors to the contrary, the Santa vigorously denies that any sugar plum fairies perform combat roles for the north pole. The quartet of Sugar Plum Service fairies present at Operation Chimney Sweep were simply serving an advisory role and assisting in the reeducation of enemies of Santa.

Action
At 1230hrs on December 4, Sleigh One arrived outside City Hall to much fanfare. The phalanx of security was tested almost immediately when a suspicious present was spotted and defused by the Sugar Plum Service.
DSC_6085editweb Photo by The Project FC used with permission

Sleigh One then proceeded without incident up Polk Street and then to Union Square for community relations operations.

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Mrs. Claus meets her constituents as Capt. EDW Pine Nut and elf agents stand guard. Photo cc Sally McIntyre

Ground troops and Elvish agents then performed a surprise security sweep of the Upper Market corridor including a special operations strike against Molotov’s Bar. Operation Chimney Sweep was a resounding success and a triumph of inter-service cooperation by Santa’s security forces. Sleigh One and Santa’s helpers are now deployed around the world as part of Christmas Operational Window 2010.

Santacon 2010
Santa’s security forces receive commendation for meritorious duty. Photo cc Zachary Lara

Credits
Zachary Lara and Sally McIntyre served as embedded press photographers for Operation Chimney Sweep.
The 103rd Sleighborne was led by Lt. General “Olive” Cramer. Sergeant Reindeer “Dasher” Nash and Master Chief “Comet” Koster oversaw construction and armament of Sleigh One.
The Santa thanks all personnel for their professionalism and commitment to Christmas certainty.
For more information contact info@santaslittlesecretservice.org

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Rumors of Elaborate Security Task Force at Santacon 2010

Santacon 2010
Photo cc Zachary Lara

SAN FRANCISCO–The Office of the Santa has not yet officially responded to reports that the North Pole deployed a large combined military and elfish security task force at Saturday’s San Francisco Santacon. However, officials in Santa’s Defense Forces have confirmed that Santa’s Sleigh One was deployed in the Central West Coast region during that time period, and that elements of the 12th Nutcracker Regiment, 103rd Sleighborne Division, and “additional kinetic cheer enforcement units” were also in attendance. The Bureau of Special Christmas Operations, which oversees Santa’s Elvish security and intelligence agencies has no comment at this time due to “holiday security concerns.”

The Public Information Office of Santa’s Little Secret Service is expected to provide a full report on the rumoured task force later this week. For more information contact Santa’s Little Secret Service: info AT santaslittlesecretservice.org

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