Attack Against Easter Bunny During SF Visit Thwarted by Santa’s Little Secret Service

BYOBW 2011, San Francisco
photo by Der Dunn

During the Easter Bunny’s state visit to San Francisco on Easter Sunday, an overzealous fan “aggressively hugged” the Sacred Rabbit (video), necessitating a quick response by Santa’s Little Secret Service agents. Detail Commander EDW Lynch assures the public that during the inappropriately long 4.5 second hug, the Easter Bunny was never in real danger. Agents were on hand thanks to a longstanding security agreement between the Easter Bunny and the North Pole. The diplomatic security mission codename was Operation Trojan Rabbit.

See the Official Photo Gallery of Operation Trojan Rabbit and our Flickr group for more photos. For info on the Easter Bunny’s 2009 San Francisco visit, an elaborate security motorcade and parade, see the report on Operation Enduring Cottontail.

photo by SFRichardT

The Sacred Rabbit (codename: COTTONTAIL) took a brief tour of the city before arriving, under full security (video), at the 2011 Bring Your Own Big Wheel Race. The Bunny met its adoring public, walked the race course (where the hugging attack occurred), and then waved the checkered flag at the finish line.

Bunny Agent
photo by Jing Jie

A Fast Action Response Team of agents armed with Hare Armaments DK-97 60mm Assault Daikon were luckily unnecessary, thanks to the extensive preparedness of Santa’s Little Secret Service.

Posted in Diplomatic Deployments | 3 Comments

Video: Christmas is Certain

The Public Information Office of Santa’s Little Secret Service has authorized the release of “Christmas is Certain,” a public service announcement about Santa’s safety and the certainty of Christmas.

We wish you a safe and secure Chrismas Operational Window.

Capt. EDW Pine Nut
12th Nutcracker Regiment
Santa’s Defense Forces

Posted in Message to the Public | Tagged ,